We interrupt your usual viewing with this breaking news!!!
Word has reached us that Patrick Willis is missing, presumed AWOL from the Brotherhood.
Unconfirmed reports have him last seen upside down in a dumpster, probably intoxicated and definitely abusing the universe in general.
Inside information links this occurrence to the fact that he has just celebrated his birthday, and while it seems plausible that the two facts could mesh together, Highlanders command have taken a dim view of this sort of behavior during a Clan War and have offered a bounty of 500 niodes for his successful apprehension on desertion charges.
Although we have not seen the paperwork, we presume (or hope) that the warrant reads 'Dead or Alive'.
It would serve the old fart right in our opinion.
In other news, we hear that there is also a warrant out for the arrest of Kenneth Hicks on charges of 'Stupefying with Intent' and 'Kidnapping'.
At present, the two charges are completely unrelated, at least until such times as I can fabricate such evidence to implicate the A.N.N. as the ring leaders.
Bugger...
You weren't supposed to see that...
Just remember, you are all still under the influence of the Gorax Plague and any testimony you produce can be easily thrown out of court.
Just saying...
Submitted by David McCallum #701548