Fire And Pain - CW3322 Round 3 By John Ringo #899287

The smell of burnt electronics assaulted his nose and the sound of metal saws and plasma cutters filled his ears. His left arm was trapped against the armrest of his chair from the side of his cockpit that was caved in from the final staggering blow that brought his mech down in the final furball of this round of combat. His med computer had a cocktail of pain meds coursing through his veins so he did not feel much pain but hard one experience told him the arm was crushed and the Doc would have his skills put to the test yet again making him whole and ready for the next battle. Blood was seeping down his forehead from a small gash a piece of exploding equipment caused when it struck the visor of his combat helmet breaking it into pieces. He slowly raised his right arm to wipe away the blood from his eyes to not much success. The movement caused his pain levels to spike in his damaged left side. His Med Comp increased his dosage and the world swirled to the left and fell over. John found himself drifting in and out memories of the battle and consciousness.

The dropship was filled with the electric energy of adrenaline and excitement and the squad finished the final pre-launch checks on their mechs. Everything was in the Green and a few rapid-fire puffs later the dropship detached from its docking clamps and floated out of the air lock on the transport. Planetoid FDW-6312 filled the dropship pilots view screen as he keyed in the final commands needed to execute the combat drop to the ground below. Emerald Dragons was facing Renegades {BHG} in the final round of combat for this year’s Clan War. John Ringo wanted to get on the ground asap to gain whatever edge the squad could from being first on the ground so this was going to be a brutal drop right on the edge of the stresses the ship was designed to withstand. Like a sucker punch to the gut the main drives fired and propelled the ship the short distance to the atmosphere. The engines throttled back some but did not cut off to let the ship glide in like a normal landing. The turbulence was incredible and the ship bucked like a thing possessed. Alarms started blaring and the world started to spin. One of the stabilizers had jammed and the ship’s crew frantically fought to free it to save the ship from a terminal velocity meeting with the ground. The gods of war blessed their efforts and stabilizer came back online in time for the pilot to recover enough to avoid a fatal crash but not fast enough to make a normal landing. The brace for impact alarms sounded and then the ship hit the ground hard and plowed across the ground. It was some time before the crew could get the damage repaired on the bay doors to get the mechs out of the ship.

Once free John rallied his people to break up into smaller squads and scatter. BHG was just coming over the hill and began to fire on them. The day was filled with shoot and scoot tactics as each squad tried to gain the upper hand. Both teams kept slowing earning points evenly through the match and in the last hours of the round only a few points separated them. With only a few minutes left John lead the charge right into the enemy’s teeth. The fire from both sides was so intense it was like the doors of hell swung open and swallowed them all. As the clock ran out his mech suffered a savage blow crushing the left side of his cockpit. His vision started to blur from the pain and blood seeping into his eyes but he could still make out the final score shown on the battle computer. The Dragons were a few points short of victory. The pain and meds pulled him down into the darkness.

There was a crack as the front of his damaged cockpit broke free and fell to the ground. John’s blood crusted eyes could barely make out the Chief Johnsons face anxiously looking in at him. “He’s alive!” Shouted the Chief. “Get that stretcher over here and be careful. His left arm is badly damaged.”

John felt careful hands cutting free his harness and lifting him onto the stretcher. He was passed down to the ground below and the Doc gave him a quick inspection while a Med Tech cleaned the blood from his eyes so he could clearly see the carnage of the last charge. Standing as close by as he could and not get in the way of the medical staff was Michael Moeykens, leader of the Renegades. His face showed relief when the Doc announced that John would survive. The staff allowed him to walk over to John. John raised his right arm in salute and in a raspy voice spoke. “Your people put up one hell of a fight Micheal. As soon as I am patched up we will start training for next the next war. The Doc says I will have to miss the after party but please join in with my squad and have a good time. Congratulations on your Gold medal and we will see you again on the battlefield.”

Submitted By John Ringo #899287

Pirates Get In The Way - CW3322 Round 2 By John Ringo #899287

“Status update Chief” Barked John Ringo.

Chief Craig Johnson glanced down at his monitor and quickly scanned the information for any changes since the last time his frustrated commander asked. “All the mechs maintenance checks are complete, we still do not have our coordinates for our next battle and the ordnance resupply ship still has not messaged us and is not on our scanners.”

John clinched his jaw shut tightly to keep the hot reply boiling in his guts from escaping his mouth. It was not the Chief’s fault the resupply ship was late. “Ok Chief, I think it is time I get out of your hair and let you get on with your job. I will be in my office working on the never ending pile of paper work. Let me know as soon as you have anything on that missing ship.” John turned and started walking towards his office door.

“Yes Sir!” Replied Chief Johnson. The Chief was relieved to have his officer out of sight so he could focus on fixing this messed up situation. He hated to see the boss stressed out so he bent to work adjusting the scanner settings in the hopes of finding any sign of that ship.

John walked passed his desk and over to the window in his office that overlooks the launch bay. All the mechs look ready to go except for all the ammo vaults still had the doors open waiting to feed those hungry mechs their food of destruction and death. The techs busied themselves checking everything again and again just to give themselves something to focus on while they waited like everyone else for word on the needed ammo. The terminal on his desk chimed indicating he had a message. John walked to his desk, sat down and opened the message from command. They now knew where the next battle was going to be. Planet AXT-64008 – A barren world with canyons and mesas covering the designated combat area. Looking at the topographical map overlay, John started putting together a very bold and risky battle plan.

There was a valley that ran along close to a mesa that had a rock slide that was parallel and 143 meters from the lip of the valley. He would load half his squad with missiles and sneak them in behind that rock slide and have them power down. They would have programed in a fire pattern that would blanket a section on the valley floor with everything they had. The rest of his squad would only have 1/3 of the normal weapon load out and with the freed-up tonnage load extra ECM gear. Normally you would use this equipment to jam the enemy targeting computers but instead they would emit extra signals that would make it look like all his squad was in that group. This would give the mechs hiding behind that rock slide a better chance at their sneak attack but it made it much easier for the bad guys to target them. John would carry every Big Bertha his mech could mount. When the enemy was in the kill zone his squad would halt and turn to face the enemy. John would fire on the canyon walls behind the bad guys to trigger a landslide behind them. The rest of his team would fire and evade while backing away from the enemy mechs and act like they are panicking slightly. With what looks like a failed ambush attempt and disorder in the ranks, the enemy should aggressively pursue them and not notice in time the hail of death raining down from above. His com chimed and hit mashed the accept button. “Yes?” He spoke in a firm tone.

“Sir we just made contact with the ordnance ship. They ran into some Pirates and had to fight free of the action. They have minor damage but will be able to dock with us and unload shortly.”

“Thanks for the good news Chief. Get yourself down to the launch bay and get everyone ready to load up the mechs as fast as it comes of the transport. I want to leave here in 30 minutes for our combat zone.” He hit the end call button and made a few last notes and sent the combat plans to his squad leaders. Now it was time to let his people do what they do best and get down to the drop ship….

The ship’s bar was crammed full of Emerald Dragons and HF:442 Infantry Regiment pilots. The battle had gone mostly to plan and the Dragons were toasting their victory and the bravery of their HF counterparts. The HF pilots were making aggressive use of the open bar and enjoying themselves in the after-action party. John Ringo and Wayne Quesada were sitting at a small table in the corner of the room trying to stay out of the line of fire around the bar. John raised his glass in salute to the other officer. “Here is to you and your group Wayne. Thanks for being good sports and we wish you better luck in the next round.”

Submitted By John Ringo #899287

A Few Points Of Difference By David McCallum #701548

Hi folks, just checking in...

As you've probably noticed (or not) due to the lack of absolutely awesome articles and reviews from me, I'm taking a hiatus from Galaxy Gathering and general piloting duties in general.

OK, that’s a fib.

Yes, I'm not on the active duty roster and It's certainly a nice change not to have to put up with Patrick's drunken mumblings on a daily basis (although young Mr. Ringo is certainly taking on a certain air of dishevelment mixed with mid-day imbibement associated with the editors chair and the place still needs a good vacuum out), but I have to confess I have been dabbling with another robot based battle simulator.

And this is the point where I break the fourth wall and come out of my in-game persona, because I need to make some real life comparisons and point out some of the things that Nick and the devs do right. And I can say that by direct comparison to a competing organization.

Bug fixes/tech support: Generally speaking, these are addressed and fixed ASAP. Not only that, but the community is aware that it is being worked on by an acknowledgement and real time feedback. Is it perfect? No... there are still outstanding issues on individual accounts that haven't been addressed. But my word the response and feedback is a stellar cut above other companies.

Free offers: Everyone gets a chance at them. By running the "free item on login" for a full server day, anyone in the world has a chance to partake. This is key for any online game; the community covers every time zone. Sure we get the odd Flash Sale, and they can be frustrating as they are time zone centric, but by and large the whole planet gets a chance. Other companies are very country centric.

Making Payments: I don't know how much research Nick did into this, but compared to other companies, this is just hassle free.

I was naughty... I tried to give a competitor some money as a treat for my son. Their banking system asked for way more details that I was ever going to give them (including stuff that my bank advises it's customers to NEVER give out...) and when I queried it, they told me that I (the customer) had to get in touch with MY bank (on my time..) to ensure that I authorized a payment to THEM so it could be passed on to the company.

Or alternatively, the vendor can take a letter of complaint and not get any money, because I don't jump through hoops to get somebody to take my cash off me.

Special events: Again, Gamescraftsmen makes this a world wide thing. Wars, Clicathons, even KotMs have a variable end time so no time zone gets continuously shafted. I'm currently having to console a very devastated junior pilot because they had a big event with spot giveaways that lasted about an hour an a quarter. At 4 o'clock in the morning. Not to be repeated. Even the US would have missed out as it would have been around 10am server time (for MG) on a workday. That's just a bit silly for a worldwide audience.

Aha, I can hear you thinking... where is the impartial reporting that the Galaxy Gathering prides itself upon? Why does this sound like a chorus line from Nick's personal cheerleading department?

Well, I can put your mind at rest. Yes, there is at least one thing that Nick and the devs could do.

So far, they have avoided (in recent memory at least) any direct interviews from the player community.

A printed one would be good, but I'm pretty sure we have the tech available to do a Nick/devs live stream community Q&A. Others certainly do.

However, in summary, sometimes you just need to stop whining and be thankful for what you have, because believe me it could be a whole lot worse.

From a direct comparison, I can attest to that fact.

Submitted By David McCallum #701548

Requiem of The Final Day By Daniel Chung #323564

He took in the scene in front of him with tired eyes on a haggard face. Shattered mechs with broken bodies and twisted unrecognizable wrecks littered the battlefield as far as the eye can see. Some of them were still smoking, 9 hours after ceasefire. He saw splatters of brown, of blood and gore mixed with grease or dried trails under limbs protruding from some twisted wreck.

Techies walked among the landscape of death, finding whatever that can be salvaged, and dispatching any enemies that might still be alive. Same fate awaits the few Tiamat mechs and its pilots… for orders had been clear; those who fall against such opponents DISGRACES the clan. They do not deserve to be called members of Clan Tiamat Dragons. There were awfully few shots that rang out from the tortured grounds.

And he smiled. What a beautifully ugly scene.

Such lies the fate of Xeon and Armored Core. They who dared to enter the battlefield against Clan Tiamat Dragons.

One more day… he sat back down the seat. One last fight for the treasured honor…the seat moved backwards, deeper into the cockpit. The inner armor closed down, and the two outer armors slid in from the sides. It’s eyes flickered into light and the Fext rose from its kneeling position.

Behind the Fext stood ranks upon ranks of mechs arrayed in battle formation. Thirteen companies of them all. Pikes, Reapers, Notos, Boreas, Regis, Anubis, and many more classes of mechs. Some of them were zealously washed and maintained, as though fresh from factory. Some took pride in its scars of battle, deceptively unwashed and unkempt yet fully repaired and operational. Thirteen companies of blood drenched HATE. Two black days of death, of ending hopes, of breaking wills.

One final opponent yet to ruin. Aye… but this one is different. This one is no pushover. This may even be a fight to the bitter end.

Two magnificent creatures, one of myth, the other of legend.

BURN… BURN IT ALL… LET DIV 6 BURN TO RUIN IN THEIR FIGHT TO THE DEATH!!!!!

Submitted By Daniel Chung #323564

Playing In The Mud - CW3322 Round 1 - By John Ringo #899287

The Emerald Dragons launch bay was humming with the sounds of war. The techs and mechanics rushing around changing the equipment and weapons on each mech to match the loadouts chosen by each pilot for this round of combat. John Ringo stood on the small balcony outside his office and surveyed the launch bay. To anyone who was not familiar with what it takes to get a mech combat unit ready for launch this might look like anarchy and chaos. To John, the sights, sounds and smells were the like the first few bars in the introduction to his favorite dubstep track. The excitement and energy building until the sweet release of the drop and his team swings into action. His heart swelled with pride as he turned around and walked back into his office. One last check over his desk to make sure everything was in readiness and it was time to get to the briefing room for the pre-launch meeting.

The room quickly got up from the desks and snapped to attention and saluted as he walked through the door and over to the podium. John dashed up a salute in reply and with a wave of his hand bade the room to settle back into their chairs. With a push of a button the holo projectors on each desk came to life and the briefing started. “Ok guys and girls, we have Smurf War Patrol for our first dance this war. They are able to field a greater amount of tonnage then we currently can but I think we can use that against them.” He said. “Of the three possible combat areas on this rock, two have had heavy rainfall yesterday. The open ground should have had enough time to dry out but where there is thick jungle it should still be swampy enough to bog down a mech that is unfortunate enough to walk into the mire. So here is the plan folks. If we draw zone Alpha standard engage and fade tactics will apply. If we are lucky enough for zones Bravo or Charlie we will send out two light scouting elements and quickly locate the enemy. Then we will bring the main force to bear when they have an exposed flank when they are close to the jungle. If we hit them with everything we have they should try to risk the jungle for some cover. If they get bogged then we encircle them and finish it then and there. If they do not then we will have to wing it and do our best.” He paused and as everyone looked up at him he one at a time looked them all in the eyes. “Win or lose let’s have fun out there. Everyone get to your mechs and button up. We launch in 15. Dismissed!”

The drop ship separated from the carrier and hurtled towards the planet below. John’s face pulled back into a feral grin as the G forces increased as the booster engines kicked in. The heads-up display in his helmet chimed and the target info updated. He opened a com channel to the unit. “The Bravo Beacon just turned on. We will be on the ground in 30 seconds. Lock and Load!”

The ship hit the dirt in more of a controlled crash than what could be considered a landing. Mechs quickly spilled out of it like ants from a knocked over ant hill. The scouts quickly found the Smurfs slowly picking their way through the wet areas close to the jungle. Emerald’s main combat force double timed it to be in position on the exposed enemy flank in time. Just when the Smurfs could not be in a worse field position the team attacked driving them into the jungle trees and into the sludge like mud. It was quickly over and all that was left was to help the Smurfs extract their mechs from the mud so everyone could get to the after party. John opened a channel to Huijari Peli the Smurfs commander. “Thanks for the fight. Better luck next time mate. You are welcome to join us on our ship for the after party before you ship out for round two. The drinks are on us!”

Submitted By John Ringo #899287

CW3322 - WTF? By John Ringo #899287

This clan war everyone from the largest clan family to the smallest independent clan are getting ready to chase after and battle the Pirate King. We all needed at least one of the available four specialists to be a 20T so many of us updated or created that formation knowing we would be facing that one for sure in this battle. Everyone got busy and slipped into the comfortable traditions and superstitions that make up each clans war preparations. The division brackets were announced and with them came an early release of the war prizes. Almost everyone was happy and surprised to see what we would a be fighting so hard to win before the first shot was fired. Next the betting dens opened up for business and all the pilots who are inclined to take part in the betting chances this war got busy looking over the divisions to figure out who would be this wars winner and bring home some extra niodes from their hoped for winnings.

Almost a day later something happened the caused the MG Player Page and clan chats to heat up. Every AFF clan in this war had their names changed to XEON and each clan page has the XEON logo and motto. This change after the clans were locked and after the divisions were made public could only have been done by Nick Shaperio and his team. The question on everyone’s mind is to what end is this change for? Will this be just for a laugh? Will this create event lore that will live on in the history of the game? Are the players and leadership in AFF getting any extra niodes, gear, weapons or mechs for taking part in this? Who’s idea was this… Nick and team or was this put forth by a player? Only time will reveal answers to some or all of these questions.

At the time of this writing Bob Goetz stated on the Players Page that the AFF was not dead and an article in A.N.N would be forthcoming to shed some light on these changes.

Now most of us are in this to kick mech ass and collect our prizes so we can build stronger formations and do it all over again the next war and do not get into the lore details to deep. But this change feels a little last second and clumsy. Why make the changes after the divisions are out and public? If you wanted to bet this war and did not get it done asap when the betting opened you had a lot more work than normal to sort through the clans, figure out who was who and then make sure you clicked on the right “XEON” in the divisions that had more than one in the same division on your betting sheet. The seasoned betting veterans might have found this to be not too big of a deal but what about newer players to this game who might be trying to bet for the first time? Did any of them give up in confusion over this? I hope the answer is there were none but unless they speak up we might never know.

Right now there is less than one hour left until we get this party started so I leave you all to your final checks and preparations. I hope you all have lots of fun over the next three rounds and I look forward to joining with you all to kick some pirate ass in the after-war raid!

See you on the battlefield. *Salute*

Submitted By John Ringo #899287

Liquid Torch Weapon Review By John Ringo #899287

The smell of napalm and ash. The sight of blackened ground and charcoal where trees once stood. These things can be yours to enjoy with a purchase of a Liquid Torch. This wonderful weapon costs 555 Ferrite, 259 Bioptics and 33 Niodes unless you want to buy it in a five pack for 132 Niodes and yes if you have the Niodes to spare you really want to do just that. You also must be at least level 37 to buy these in the open market unless you are lucky and win one as a prize.

This weapon is fast at 104 Speed and it hits hard for its level with 52 Damage. This makes this weapon a good match for any mech that wants to hit fast and hard even if that mech does not have any extra fire damage boost natively or from gear.

The feature I love the most about it is the 16% burn chance. Burn can turn any mech into a DPS god if you can stack enough concurrent burn effects to get an ignite. You match a bunch of these up with a mech like the Inferno and watch your foes burn from all the stacking burn effects that combine into the ignite effect and rapidly turn them into char. BBQ Anyone?

Submitted By John Ringo #899287

A Bunny With An Egg On The Planet Tufo By John Ringo #899287

Space, deep space. A face with tired eyes and a bored expression illuminated by the sickly green glow from the instrument panel can be seen reflected in the cockpit window. The only sounds were from the air recyclers, random beeping from the cockpit displays and little sighs from the single occupant of the small vessel. The “Value” ship from Rent A Wreck might get you to where you are going but it did not have anything in the way of entertainment on board. Even though he has listened to this recording what feels like at least one thousand times on this trip it was time to do it again just to fill the cabin with different sounds. He reached out and hit the play button.

“Hey John, It’s Patrick. I have a local culture assignment for you. Get yourself a ship and head over to the planet Tufo and make contact with a local named Jumba. He will act as your guide to prepare you for the needed holiday guest tasks. If you are successful then you will become an honorary tribe member and can witness the King’s Gift ceremony. So, have a good time and see you when you get back. Cheers!” John sighs one last time and stows the message player back in his pack. Fatigue finally overcomes the rough vibration of the ships engines and he drifts off to sleep.

The change in the engine vibrations woke him up from his nap. Finally, he was at Tufo and can get to work. A short time later he was docked in his assigned landing space at the small space port. The air lock seals popped as the door cycled open. A flood of foreign smells assaulted his nose with the influx of warm, humid air from the planet. John stepped through the hatch and shaded his eyes while he looked around the landing field for Jumba. A local holding a sign with “John Ringo – G.G.” written on it was standing in the shade of a local tree that looks like a blue feather duster outside the small traffic control hut. John walked down the ramp and across the tarmac to the sign holding local. “You must be Jumba?” He said.

“Yes, I am Jumba. Welcome to Tufo John. We are happy to have a reporter from The Galaxy Gathering honor us with a story on our King’s Gift ceremony. Follow me to our ground transport and we will get you started on your Holiday Guest tasks right away.” He turned and started walking towards a yellow truck parked close by. I picked up my pack and followed him not knowing what to expect next.

After a short drive, we reached my guest home and he wasted no time putting me to work. The next week was a blur as Jumba guided me through the ceremonial tasks of personal cleansing, food shopping, kitchen cleaning and food preparation. Another few days were spent on ritual Holiday Hall decoration, plastic egg hiding in the large garden outside and dance class for the gift presentation to the King. Jumba was pleased with my efforts and presented me with an ID card stating I was an honorary tribal member. He gave me a box holding the needed costume and told me to get dressed. The ceremony would start in an hour. I opened the box and lifted a white and gray furred bunny costume. After putting it on and looking at myself in a mirror I could not help but feel silly. Jumba checked me over and made a few small adjustments and pronounced me ready and handed me my basket that held the King’s gift. After a quick mental review of the dance steps I opened the door and walked outside.

The garden was packed with families lined up on both side of the path I was to dance down. The King’s was seated at the end of the path. The happy squeals of delight from the children as they watched me step into view filled my ears. I took my place at the end of the path and with the start of the music performed what the locals call “The Bunny Dance”. I reached the King at the end of the dance and held out the basket containing his gift. After taking the gift box out of the basket he opened it and lifted out the chocolate bunny inside and had a big bite. He proclaimed it was good and everyone cheered and shouted, “Happy Easter!”. The adults then got in line for the buffet and the children started hunting for plastic eggs filled with candy and small toys. The King thanked me for the great work I did getting this party ready and presented me with my own gift basket. In it was an autographed picture of the King, some smaller versions of the chocolate bunny, a bottle of Anti-Acids and a picture of me in my bunny suit. I did the “Bunny Hop of Thankfulness” and my duties were done. The King laughed and slapped me on the back as he went to join the party.

That night feeling sick from too much chocolate I finished writing up my story and transmitted it to Patrick. I swallowed a few of those Anti-Acid pills and wondered where I would get sent next.

Submitted By John Ringo #899287

Interns & Rumors - Part 1 By John Ringo #899287

This day was dragging on and on. The rain hitting my window was doing nothing to lift my spirits as I waded neck deep through a pool of paper work on my desk. Even the up-tempo techno music ripping though my sound system was not doing much more than making my feet tap along in time. Collating printouts and making sure all the receipts were properly filed for the staff expense reports was not how I wanted to spend my day. Life as an Intern sure is glamorous I thought to myself with an extra dose of sarcasm. Maybe I should take a break from this and go clean out the coffee pots or sweep the hallway just to mix things up a bit so I do not fall into a coma. I start to get up from my chair when my terminal chimed letting me know Ken Hicks wanted to talk to me. I hit the accept button and his face fills my screen.

“How is it going John? Are you done with those expense reports yet?” He said trying to keep the smirk off his face.

I stifled a groan as I replied “I would have been done by now if a certain person had bothered to keep his receipts in his staff issued water proof wallet as per company procedure. Most of them are barely readable at all and smell like you kept them in your shoe!”

Ken started laughing. “I had to keep them somewhere! You know I forgot my wallet and press pass in my office when I went on that trip. It is very lucky that I have a famous and handsome face or I would not have been able to finish my assignment.”

“I have spent the last 5 hours calling all the shops, pubs and hotels you visited on your last trip.” I retorted. “It was extremely difficult getting them to shut up about how happy they were the great and famous Ken Hicks visited their humble establishment so I could get a word in edgewise and ask for a copy of your receipts. One guy even recited me a poem he wrote about how you blew your nose and dropped the handkerchief on the floor and blessed his pub. He has the hankie in a display box behind the bar.”

“Yeah it has tough being me sometimes.” He beamed. “Well enough re living my glorious travels. I called you for a progress report and to let you know I have added a few more items to your task list. We have to keep you busy and out of trouble you know.”

This time I did groan before I could stop myself. “You could also keep me very busy with real reporting work instead of this list of mish mash busy work that was left over from who knows when.”

“Ok, ok. He said with his hands raised up in a defensive posture. “You can stop what you are doing and leave it for later. The last reason I called is because Patrick wants to see you in his office right away.” He reached for the end call button and my screen went back to my desktop.

“Ken, you dork. You could have just said that in the beginning and saved me some time.” I said. I would have to double time it to Patrick’s office now so I do not get on his bad side. I wonder what he has for me?

To be continued…

Submitted By John Ringo #899287

Galaxy Talk - Ep 2 (Force Ion Beam Review) By John Ringo #899287

Crappy 8-bit theme music starts playing while images showing various clan logos, mechs in action and famous places around the galaxy fade in and out on the screen and then it fades to black after the photo reel is done. After a dramatic rise in tension from the theme music the show title fades in. The camera tightens in on a shadowy figure outlined from a soft glow from some back lights. The house lights come up and the figure is revealed to be a man of middle age in suit that was in fashion last decade.

John Ringo: “Hello and welcome to Galaxy Talk. I am your host, John Ringo. Tonight, our panel will take a look at one of the most important weapons for mech pilots just starting out. The Force Ion Beam is a niode weapon and the factory specs and it’s cost you can find displayed on the upper left corner of your screen. Now let’s turn to General Stryker for his analysis. General?”

General Stryker: “Thanks John. Now for this demonstration we have the Force Ion Beam installed on a Red Ant and we have an Anzu with Viper Lasers for the target. Both mechs have no equipment installed.”

John Ringo: “Ah I thought we were just going to have a lab test of this weapon General?”

General Stryker: “This is the only way to properly test a weapon John. Get it out in the field for combat conditions. It is more fun this way as well.”

John Ringo: “Ok you are the expert.  Roll tape please.”

The Red Ant and Anzu start on opposite sides of the testing range. They begin to maneuver towards each other using the terrain to its best advantage. As they engage each other the Anzu is using its speed advantage to avoid most of the fire from the Red Ant. After the Red Ant scores a few hits the Anzu starts to look sluggish and clumsy. The Red Ant presses its advantage and the Anzu pilot ejects in his escape pod. The Anzu then explodes in a violent, multi-color display of flame and metal fragments.

General Stryker: “Hot damn I love my job! Now that was a great demonstration of why this weapon is very powerful to a pilot just starting out. This weapon has a Slow effect built in and as you saw the Red Ant was able to hang in there and after connecting a few times the enemy was slowed down enough to be an easy kill.”

John Ringo: “Thank you General that was exciting. Now this weapon is special for another reason. Those who are lucky enough to be chosen as test subjects can watch video ads and earn a Force Ion Beam for each ad they watch. This can help a new pilot get the upper hand against their foes in combat and veteran pilots can sell them to any weapons dealer for a niode each. The producers have had Chuck in the studio next door watching ads for the last full day to help pay for this shows production costs. Let’s cut to Chuck and see how he is doing.”

Chuck is sitting in a chair. There are 12 monitors arrayed in a 45 degree arc in front of him playing a different ad on each screen. His eyes are glazed over and his limbs are twitching in a random and spastic pattern. He starts to speak in a giddy, sing-song voice.

Chuck: “Hatoraide, Harotaide. Drink it down and feel the rage! Hehehehehehehehehe”

John Ringo: “Well that is unfortunate. On that bombshell thanks for watching. Goodnight!”

The crummy theme music starts playing as the camera pulls back and the screen slowly fades to black.

Submitted By John Ringo #899287

Galaxy Talk - Ep 1 By John Ringo #899287

Crappy 8-bit theme music starts playing while images showing various clan logos, mech in action and famous places around the galaxy fade in and out on the screen and then it fades to black after the photo reel is done. After a dramatic rise in tension from the theme music the show title fades in. The camera tightens in on a shadowy figure outlined from a soft glow from some back lights. The house lights come up and the figure is revealed to be a man of middle age in suit that was in fashion last decade.

John Ringo: “Hello and welcome to the first episode of Galaxy Talk. I am your host, John Ringo. Tonight, our panel will take on tough questions submitted by viewers like you. Before we get to our first question lets meet our panel. For our first panelist, we have Retired General Stryker. General thanks for joining the show and providing us with your thoughts from a military perspective.”

General Stryker: “Hello John and thanks for having me on the show.”

John Ringo: “Next we have Joan Glitter, former CEO of “Sparkle” fashion magazine. Joan, it will be interesting to see what you will bring to the discussion. I am not sure how well fashion relates to mechs and weapons but the network thought you would bring something valuable to the team so welcome to the show.”

Joan Glitter: “John dahling that is because you clearly have no fashion sense what so ever… just look at that horrible suit you are wearing. It is so plain and boring! It is so old it should be on a mummy. Right now, I do not care to talk about your silly robots and weapons as we need to talk about your wardrobe so I do not fall into a coma looking at you.”

John Ringo: “Well Joan this is what the producers gave me to wear so you should take it up with them. The last member of our panel is Chuck. The producers found him wondering around the lobby looking lost and gave him the job as our man on the street. Welcome Chuck.”

Chuck: “Uh, I am getting paid for this right?”

John Ringo: “Yes, whatever you and the producers agreed to when you signed on.”

Chuck: “mmmmm good. I like Gummy Bears.”

John Ringo: “Ok then. Moving on we have a view submitted question for our panel so let’s watch the video.”

The video monitor comes to life and the camera focuses in on a young man in a non-descript pilots uniform. The words at the bottom of the picture identify him as Grady Hassleon of the clan Mutt’s Revenge.

Grady Hassleon: “Hello, I would like to ask the panel why the guys in my barracks are always smearing things like stinky cheese and axle grease into my pillow and bed under the pillow case and sheets. Since I joined up with this unit a few weeks ago, I have not been able to get a good night’s rest. I am so tired that I am afraid I will mess up my first combat mission at the end of this week.”

John Ringo: “Sounds rough over there at Mutt’s Revenge. Ok who wants to take the first crack at this?”

General Stryker: “I will John. Son, clearly you are being put through a hazing ritual as the new guy in your unit. You just need to hang tight and get through your first combat run to prove yourself and then they should leave you alone.”

Joan Glitter: “No he needs to change his outfit. It is so boring his friends are trying the only way the know how to make it look better. Only mech jocks would think smearing grease and cheese on your clothing would improve it. Maybe if you try a few colors of paint or feathers you will wow them enough to leave you alone.

Chuck: “Cheese and grease sounds tasty. I am hungry…”

Chuck gets up and walks off stage towards the guest lounge

John Ringo: “Oh boy. What did I get myself into… The producer is signaling me we are all out of time. Thanks to our panel for their views tonight and thanks to our viewer Grady for his question. I hope the panel has helped you out. Until next time thanks for watching!”

The crummy theme music starts playing as the camera pulls back and the screen slowly fades to black.

Submitted By John Ringo #899287